Go Grab Some Lunch

By Gail Belsky

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When was the last time you met your mate for lunch? And what was the dish du jour? Tuna melt? Chef’s salad? Western omelet? No wonder you can’t remember. But if you plan a romantic lunch date -- as nice as any dinner -- neither one of you will soon forget it. Why is an afternoon rendezvous so special? Because it’s unexpected.

When you’re in a long-term relationship, “new or different is more exciting than the familiar,” says Susan Heitler, Ph.D., author of the Power of Two: Skills For a Strong and Loving Marriage (New Harbinger Publications 1997). “Anytime you and your partner introduce something new, it adds an additional dollop of positive energy to the relationship.”

Susan Korones of Memphis, Tenn. has met her husband for a few romantic lunches over the years. All were great, but one birthday celebration, in particular, stood out. They went to a five-star restaurant on a blisteringly hot summer day. “It was extremely elegant, with lots of flowers,” she says. “It was so cool and luxurious in there, and it was 100 degrees outside. It was an oasis.” And for an upscale outing, it was remarkably low-key. That’s what makes lunch dates so much different than dinner dates. “It’s not at the end of the day, and there’s less pressure on it,” says Korones. “The expectations aren’t so high, and the stakes aren’t so high.”

Neither are the prices. Many high-end restaurants offer lunch menus that are more affordable than their dinner fare. And while the portions may be smaller, that’s actually a good thing: more room for dessert. Thinking of making a reservation? Here, some tips for making your special day truly special:

Clear the decks Pick a day when neither one of you has to run back to work. Part of the fun is feeling like you’re playing hooky. “It’s the two of you together, walking around outside while everyone else is running back to work,” says Korones. (If you don’t have that kind of flexibility in your job, send the kids for a playdate and do it on the weekend. You’ll still feel like you’ve ducked out.)

Go somewhere splashy Your local coffee shop may turn out a mean burger, but it’s hardly romantic. For your special lunch date pick a restaurant that’s so fabulous you might not even go there for dinner.

Get dressed up You don’t need to pull out your stilettos and pearls for lunch; getting too fancy makes it less relaxed. But nice pants and a sexy top elevate the date to “prime-time” status without being over-the-top.

Order wine or champagne Go on…one little glass probably won’t hurt. And it makes the afternoon even more of a departure from the regular routine.

Don’t skip dessert The whole lunch is about indulgence. Are you really going to pass up the silky crème brûlée because it’s not on your diet?

Make it a surprise If the point of a romantic lunch is to do something new and different, imagine how much more exciting it would be if it were a surprise? Tell your partner to set aside two hours for you on a slow day, and then whisk him away. Now that’s romance.

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